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Pick-up Lines 9/4/2006
You know those cheesy pick-up lines that have mixed results?
Well, lets share a few of them. Post your lamest/coolest/best
pick-up lines here for all to read. Perhaps you can help
some guy *cough* get a little success
I would post one, but all I can think of at the moment are the
stereotypical overused ones...
0 Comments, 209 Views,
9 Votes
,1.29 Score |
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First date 8/25/2006
How I Entertain a New Date:
I had a date the other night at my place. On the phone
the day before, the girl asked me to "Cook her
something she's never had before" for dinner.
After
many minutes of scratching my head over what to make,
I finally settled on something she has DEFINITELY
never eaten. I got out my trusty case of MRE's (Meal,
Ready-to-Eat). Field rations that ...
2 Comments, 131 Views,
12 Votes
,3.15 Score |
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what it do 8/14/2006
hay i can say im a pretty nice girl, i havent meet any for-real
people on here.im just lookin to hook up with a few bad bitchz, an
some big dick men, that know how to put it down on a horny
ass black girl.is that really 2 much 2 ask 4??aint tis what
this place is 4.
1 Comments, 132 Views,
10 Votes
,3.98 Score |
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SuperMan 8/5/2006
women should understand that man need love beside sex....
can't be your Superman who give afuck only
bitches, they come they go....love stays onlyyy
0 Comments, 106 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score |
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A joke 7/9/2006
What combination of three two letter words means small?
"Is it in"
0 Comments, 707 Views,
14 Votes
,4.10 Score |
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I'm a virgin and I don't know 6/29/2006
The bride tells her husband
The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you
know I'm a virgin and I don't know
anything about sex. Can you explain it to me
first?"
"OK, Sweetheart. Putting it simply, we will
call your private place 'the
prison' and call my private thing 'the
prisoner'. So what we do is: put the
prisoner in the ...
2 Comments, 847 Views,
40 Votes
,5.39 Score |
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WHEN WE GIRLS DRINK TOO MUCH............ 6/8/2006
WHEN WE GIRLS DRINK TOO MUCH............
<br>
1. WE HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHERE OUR PURSE OR CELL PHONE
IS.
<br>
2. WE BELIEVE THAT DANCING WITH OUR ARMS OVERHEAD AND WIGGLING
OUR BUTT WHILE YELLING "WOO-HOO!" IS TRULY
THE SEXIEST DANCE MOVE AROUND.
<br>
3. WE'VE SUDDENLY DECIDED THAT WE WANT TO KICK SOMEONE'S
ASS AND HONESTLY BELIEVE WE COULD DO IT TOO.
...
4 Comments, 536 Views,
31 Votes
,6.50 Score |
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I want a girl who ... 6/5/2006
I want a girl who doesn’t know the meaning of the word quit,
but does know the meaning of most other words.
I want a woman who understands spontaneous passion, can
thrill to dizzy sudden sex (while keeping her balance),
and who understands that we probably would not be allowed
to shop at that grocery store ever again. (“Mommy, why is
that woman snorting like a rhino?” ...
2 Comments, 376 Views,
5 Votes
,3.80 Score |
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sexual fantasies of women 5/31/2006
It shouldn't be surprising that women have fantasies
too. Sometimes, they are more sexual than ours. In this
article we will discuss the top ten fantasies that women
have. You will want to print this one out for future reference.
Here we go, please pay attention!
Having sex with strangers: This might sound odd, but women
fantasize about this as well. Having sex with a complete ...
1 Comments, 462 Views,
11 Votes
,3.35 Score |
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PARTYTIME 5/24/2006
I thought for my first party i'd get an even number of
both sexes together with your own thoughts and fettishes,
as well as sexual needs. The erotic side of it is that there
could be a lot of people who are meeting for the first time,
or there could be small groups of people turning up together.So
on the 10th of June, (a saturday) we will have this get together
and see what happens. I now ...
0 Comments, 72 Views,
0 Votes
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My truck got some action 5/9/2006
I walked to the grocery store yesterday hoping to stretch
my legs instead of driving there. I come back about 3 hours
later to find that my next-door neighbor is sitting in my
truck, inside my garage, with the gear shifter up her pussy.
I almost died fucking laughing at that point, except that
she then bent over and asked for it up the ass... what a great
day.
0 Comments, 178 Views,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score |
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GIMME BACK MY CHI!!! 4/12/2006
C stayed with me last night. He got up early as usual to head
off to work. I never felt him get out of bed, so I looked at
him funny when he came to kiss me goodbye trying to figure
out why he was dressed. I got out of bed about an hour after
he left, went online for a few hours to sort out files, cleaned
up just a little (didn't have to much motivation in
this department today) and then ...
2 Comments, 347 Views,
19 Votes
,2.20 Score |
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I Am Hung 3/16/2006
One Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair,
drinking beer and watching my woman mow the lawn.
The neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged
at this that she came over and shouted at me, "You should
be hung."
I calmly replied, "I am.
That’s why she cuts the grass".
3 Comments, 626 Views,
29 Votes
,4.64 Score |
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if she say's no 3/12/2006
guy's if you meet a female and all she want's to
do is give head and she won't let you fuck or touch her
pussy then you might wanna run because this female really
might be a male.
2 Comments, 155 Views,
8 Votes
,2.78 Score |
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My girlfriend's sister 3/10/2006
Someone told me this story and I want to share with you. This
guy is a friend of a friend of mine.
I was engaged and have already planned a marriage with my
girlfriend. Her family seems to welcome me, especially
her younger sister. When my girlfriend is not looking,
she always come close to me, hug me and rub her breast against
my arm. I thought she was just kidding but I ...
1 Comments, 688 Views,
29 Votes
,6.75 Score |
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penis size 2/28/2006
This is the age old question about which matters more...size
or use? which do y'all think is more true? Does a bigger
penis automatically mean better sex? or does it all depend
on "attack" style?
9 Comments, 713 Views,
19 Votes
,2.99 Score |
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flame that burns forever 2/19/2006
I belive the key point in a relationship is humor and sex.
You have to be able to take a joke.Taking every word seriously
makes not only you but the other person miserable. With
that said however there is a line that shouldnt be crossed,
which you only learn through trial and error.A helpful
technique to use around other people when your partner
pisses you off, is to respond with something ...
0 Comments, 157 Views,
10 Votes
,2.59 Score |
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Tips for a Happy Relationship...... 2/15/2006
Borrowed from the late, great Red Skelton.
<br>
1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little
beverage, share good food and companionship. She goes
on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.
<br>
2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California
and mine is in New York.
<br>
3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way
back.
...
2 Comments, 154 Views,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score |
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why men wont commit??? 2/15/2006
maybe because...they cant get sex w/out commitment, they
can get the benifits of having wife by just cohabiting.
10 Comments, 376 Views,
17 Votes
,3.97 Score |
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the pussy fart 2/13/2006
there is nothing more humorous to me than a woman who queefs
after sex....it is kind of erotic because it means the pussy
is really wet, but the sounds is just too much to take....lol
3 Comments, 320 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score |
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WORDS WOMEN USE AND WHAT THEY MEAN 2/3/2006
WORDS WOMEN USE AND WHAT THEY MEAN
<br>
FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are
right and you need to shut up.
<br>
FIVE MINUTES
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes
is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes
to watch the game before helping around the house.
<br>
NOTHING
This is the ...
0 Comments, 258 Views,
11 Votes
,5.78 Score |
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Girls Vs. Grown Women 1/31/2006
Girls Vs. Grown Women
<br>
1.GIRLS leave their schedule wide-open and wait for a guy
to call and make plans.
GROWN WOMEN make their own plans and nicely tell the guy
to get in where he fits in.
<br>
2.GIRLS want to control the man in their life.
GROWN WOMEN know that if he's truly hers, he doesn't
need controlling.
<br>
3.GIRLS check you for not calling them. ...
0 Comments, 166 Views,
11 Votes
,5.22 Score |
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My Brother Does 1/30/2006
One of the best real life stories I ever heard goes back to
my college days. Some guys I knew had been out drinking and
they were heading back to the university on the bus. They
got off a couple of stops too early and were following a young
woman who was probably heading home after work. Said young
woman was very easy on the eyes and they were slightly drunk.
One of them yelled out to ...
0 Comments, 408 Views,
6 Votes
,3.93 Score |
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This is for the girls 1/28/2006
This is for the girls who understand that they aren't
perfect and neither are the guys they're interested
in.. This is for the girls who flirt and laugh and worry and
obsess over the slightest glance, whisper or touch because
somehow they are able to keep alive that hope that maybe,
just maybe this time he'll have understood.. This
is a homage to the girls who laugh loud and often, who are ...
3 Comments, 290 Views,
16 Votes
,6.21 Score |
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mating 1/27/2006
Some species mate for life. Wolves, eagles, penguins,
and other species... once mated will never take another
mate. Humans however, will not only take another after
mating, but will take another during, before and after
mating originally.
<br>
Why succumb to the socially accepted norm??
6 Comments, 283 Views,
15 Votes
,3.59 Score |
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Humorous beginners guide to AdultFriendFinder 1/17/2006
Troll… group name for the fakers, timewasters, wannabes,
and stalkers, those needing a life and those pretending
to have one. The desperados, self professed greats and
great pretenders, the masqueraders and misbehavers.
The picture collectors and traders. Those that email everyone
and those that email one person over and over and over and
over and over and over… In most cases ...
1 Comments, 356 Views,
10 Votes
,3.58 Score |
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Philofecies 1/15/2006
I lick girls' rumps. I like to lick girls' rumps.
Girls like to have their rumps licked. Most girls won't
admit they've had their rump licked, let alone enjoyed
having their rump licked. But believe you me, if you lick
a girl's rump, she'll love you for life. In fact,
that was my high school yearbook quote.
<br>
My conviction to 'slurping the brown pucker'
doesn't stem from ...
2 Comments, 209 Views,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score |
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my boyfriends 1/9/2006
The first date I had with my boyfriend, he told me he had never
had a blow job before. Apparently I couldn't see through
that. Now we've been together 2 years, and although
he's not like that anymore, it still cracks me up how
I fell for that line. It may not have been his first, but two
years later, it was obviously his best!
2 Comments, 1271 Views,
39 Votes
,5.03 Score |
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Blind Date Blunder... 12/11/2005
A friend and I were out one evening in a pub... (we're
both male) shortly upon arrival, he confessed as to why
we were there, that is, it was no accident...
<br>
No, he had arranged a blind date for the two of us - knowing
I would have probably refused to attend otherwise. All
things considered, we were already there.
<br>
We positioned ourselves near the door, so as to ...
1 Comments, 289 Views,
7 Votes
,2.02 Score |
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Little Lesson in Oral 12/7/2005
A long time ago, when I was young, dumb, and well..not full
of cum (as I'm female), but rather lusty in my ways~
I learned a valuable lesson. I was only 16, and my parents
had went to Garmisch for a vacation when we lived in Germany.
I, of course, decided to have a party and invite all of my
friends, including my then boyfriend and a few hot guys
I enjoyed flirting with. One of these guys ...
4 Comments, 873 Views,
46 Votes
,4.74 Score |